16 Things I Would Want If I Had Dementia

By:Rachael Wonderlin


If I get dementia, I want my friends and family to embrace my reality. If I think my spouse is still alive or if I think we’re visiting my parents for dinner, let me believe those things. I’ll be much happier for it.

  1. If I get dementia, I don’t want to be treated like a child. Talk to me like the adult that I am.

  2. If I get dementia, I still want to enjoy the things that I’ve always enjoyed. Help me find a way to exercise, read and visit with friends.

  3. If I get dementia, ask me to tell you a story from my past.

  4. If I get dementia and I become agitated, take the time to figure out what is bothering me.

  5. If I get dementia, treat me the way that you would want to be treated.

  6. If I get dementia, make sure there are plenty of snacks for me in the house. If I have dementia I may have trouble explaining that I’m hungry.

  7. If I get dementia, don’t talk about me as if I’m not in the room.

  8. If I get dementia, don’t feel guilty if you cannot care for me 24 hours a day, seven days a week. It’s not your fault, and you’ve done your best. Find someone who can help you, or choose a great new place for me to live.

  9. If I get dementia and I live in a dementia care community, please come and visit me often.

  10. If I get dementia, don’t act frustrated if I mix up names, events or places. Take a deep breath. It’s not my fault.

  11. If I get dementia, make sure I always have my favorite music playing within earshot.

  12. If I get dementia and I like to pick up items and carry them around, help me return those items to their original places.

  13. If I get dementia, don’t exclude me from parties and family gatherings.

  14. If I get dementia, know that I still like receiving hugs or handshakes.

  15. If I get dementia, remember that I am still the person you know and love.


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